Witty, Insightful, and Humorous Quotes

The following quotes are from an excellent collection I very much enjoyed at:  http://www.tk421.net/quotes/

“I would like to be able to admire a man’s opinions as I would his dog – without being expected to take it home with me.”- Frank A. Clark

“As I get older I notice the years less and the seasons more.” – John Hubbard

“Victory goes to the player who makes the next-to-last mistake.” – Savielly Grigorievitch Tartakower (1887-1956), Chessmaster

“A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines.” – Frank Lloyd Wright (1868-1959)

“Wit is educated insolence.”
– Aristotle (384-322 B.C.)

“Happiness is good health and a bad memory.” – Ingrid Bergman (1917-1982)

“The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense.” – Tom Clancy (1947-), paraphrasing Mark Twain

“Do, or do not. There is no ‘try’.”
– Yoda, The Empire Strikes Back

“Destiny is not a matter of change, it is a matter of choice; it is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved.”
William Jennings Bryan (1860-1925)

“If you want to build a ship, don’t herd people together to collect wood and don’t assign them tasks and work, but rather teach them to long for the endless immensity of the sea.”
Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1900-1944)

“Never forget that it is the spirit with which you endow your work that makes it useful or futile.” – Adelaide Hasse (1868-1953)

“All for one; one for all.”
– Alexander Dumas (1824-1895)

“If you haven’t got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me.”
Alice Roosevelt Longworth (1884-1980)

“The problems that exist in the world today cannot be solved by the level of thinking that created them.” – Albert Einstein (1879-1955)

“Its not the size of the dog in the fight, its the size of the fight in the dog.”
– Mark Twain (1835-1910)

“A patriot must always be ready to defend his country against his government.”
– Edward Abbey (1927-1989)

“Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.”
– Napoleon Bonaparte (1769-1821)

“After I’m dead I’d rather have people ask why I have no monument than why I have one.” – Cato the Elder (234-149 BC, AKA Marcus Porcius Cato)

“When a man is wrapped up in himself he makes a pretty small package.”
John Ruskin (1819-1900)

“I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.” – Mark Twain (1835-1910)

“They couldn’t hit an elephant at this dist–”
General John Sedgwick (1813-1864), last words

“I don’t feel good.” – Luther Burbank (1849-1926), last words

“Ask her to wait a moment – I am almost done.”
Carl Friedrich Gauss (1777-1855), when informed that his wife was dying

“99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.” – Unknown

“Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, prepare to die.”
– Klingon Proverb, Star Trek

“The greatest strength is gentleness.” – Iroquois Proverb

“Never try to teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and annoys the pig.” – Proverb

“If you lose your temper, you’ve lost the argument.” – Proverb

“Better to light a candle than curse the darkness.” – Chinese Proverb

“I have not failed, I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”
– Thomas Edison (1874-1931)

“All science is either physics or stamp collecting.”
– Ernest Rutherford (1871-1937)

“The only possible conclusion the social sciences can draw is: some do, some don’t.”

– Ernest Rutherford (1871-1937)

“A witty saying proves nothing.” – Voltaire (1694-1778)

*To this I would argue ‘that may be, Voltaire, but it makes life a darn site more entertaining.’

9 responses to “Witty, Insightful, and Humorous Quotes

  1. Enjoyed the sayings. And like you, I would have to argue with Voltaire. Maybe it proves nothing, but it’s sure food for thought.
    Happy Thanksgiving, Beth.


  2. Amen, and thanks Julie.


  3. Really enjoyed these.


  4. really refreshing but please post more of them.


  5. Great post. I use the Thomas Edison quote with the 10000 light-bulbs a lot. Don´t worry about the failures, just push through them


  6. Awesome collection. ❤


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